Don't Make New Year’s Resolutions!

If you’ve ever made a New Year’s resolution…
and then quietly abandoned it weeks (or days) later feeling frustrated and defeated— this post is for you.

Maybe you promised yourself this would be the year you:

Finally stick to healthy habits
Have more energy and patience
Get back to where you used to be
Stop starting over every January

And yet, here you are — on another New Year’s Eve — feeling hopeful and a little skeptical.

First, let me say this clearly: you are not the problem and there is a better way!

The Truth About New Year’s Resolutions

Research consistently shows that New Year’s resolutions have a very high failure rate. Studies estimate that around 80% of resolutions are abandoned by February, and many don’t even make it past the first few weeks of January.

Why?

Because resolutions often:

Are rooted in pressure, guilt, or “fixing” ourselves
Ask for drastic change all at once
Ignore real life, stress, hormones, and seasons of change
Rely heavily on motivation instead of sustainable systems

When motivation fades and life gets in the way, (and it always does), the resolution usually goes with it.

And if you’re in perimenopause, this can feel even more discouraging.

Why Resolutions Feel Especially Hard in Perimenopause

During perimenopause, your body is changing — often in ways that feel confusing and unpredictable. Energy dips, sleep struggles, mood changes, brain fog, and shifting metabolism can make it harder to “push through” the way you might have in your 30s.

So when a resolution says:

“Just try harder.”
“Be more disciplined.”
“Power through.”

Your body may be quietly saying:

“That’s not how this works anymore.”

And that’s not failure — that’s information.

It’s Not About Willpower — It’s About How Change Is Designed

Behavior change research shows that lasting habits are built through:

Small, realistic steps
Repetition over perfection
Support and accountability
Systems that fit your real life

Not through all-or-nothing promises made on January 1st.

When we rely on resolutions alone, we’re often setting ourselves up for burnout, shame, and another year of “Why can’t I just stick with it?”

What If You Didn’t Need Another Resolution?

What if you didn’t need to overhaul your entire life…
but instead learned how to create habits that actually stick?

What if this year wasn’t about becoming someone new —
but about supporting the version of you that already exists?

That’s where a different approach comes in.

A Better Way to Use New Year Energy

The New Year does bring clarity, reflection, and motivation — and that energy is valuable. The difference is how we use it.

Instead of:

“I’m going to do everything perfectly.”

We shift toward:

“What’s one small change I can realistically sustain?”

Instead of:

“I failed again.”

We move toward:

“What can I learn and adjust?”

This is exactly why I wrote my workbook
Don’t Make New Year’s Resolutions: A Guide to Creating Habits That Stick — to help women step out of the resolution cycle and into sustainable change that actually works with their bodies and lives. Check it out: Don't Make New Year's Resolutions

And it’s also why, inside my membership The Pause Party, we’re focusing this month on building habits that last — with education, encouragement, accountability, and a community of women walking the same path.

Because real change doesn’t happen alone. The Pause Party